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A Daily Parenting Advice Podcast. Non-Pretentious. In less than 3min a day!

S5-Ep242 - Not Wanting to Parent

August 26, 2019

 The nice thing about hockey practice for me (a guy who doesn’t go into a typical office every day), is that there is a plethora of people to people watch and situations to learn from. As expected, if you pay attention, the world is a really interesting place. I’m sure I’ve been viewed as an oddball when (at times) in an airport and sitting, waiting on my flight, and I’m the only guy under the age 40 for 7 gates that isn’t on his cellphone. Hell, I’ve been the oddball by stopping at a stop light and looking left and realizing everyone else is looking down at their damn cell phone.

Anyway, the world is full of things to learn if you look, and today’s lesson sat right next to me. He was 4, and he had a tablet in his hand. And my seat on the top row of a bench was the perfect place to get away from his friends who wanted to watch his tablet as well. So as small children huddled around me, not to see me of course, I got up and moved. Not mad about that. But it was the father who did have a problem with his son not sharing and moving around.

“Share with your friends!” he’d say, and promptly go back to the head down, thumbs on phone position.

And the kid would move, and not share and then,

“Share with your friends, or I’m taking it away!” he’d say, and promptly go back to the head down, thumbs on phone position.

And this went on. A lot.
And my question is – how bad do you want it? How bad does this father want his kid to share? How bad does this father want his kid to do anything?  Because he’s sure not showing it.

In fact, this is the problem I have with a lot of so called involved parents – they don’t really want to parent. Sure when they’re kids were born they sat in that OR or delivery room and promised to God above that they would do anything for their kid.

Unless it was a lesson on sharing, and their kid was failing, and there was a super interesting post on Vox.

It’s about consistency – consistency of our desires – do we really want to teach a lesson on sharing? If so, get up and take the tablet away. If we want to have a kid that does listen, we need to be consistent in our actions, not saying the same thing over and over with no consequences.
What could you improve on? And how bad do you want it?