This week we started in to the 5 factors of personality. Do you remember part 3 from yesterday? Correct. Extraversion. That ability to gain energy from a loud crazy surrounding, or Introversion, that ability to recharge your batteries from some alone time.
Today we talk about agreeableness. That’s the 4th personality trait that we come up with.
In researching these five factors, I found that there have been all kinds of theories about personalities over the years. Some crazy, some obvious. But someone spent a life’s work and came up with 4,000 different traits that define who we are. I feel bad for this person. A life’s work only to have the world devolve into a place where people form opinions over clickbait headlines, while tripping into mall water features because they were texting.
Anyway, Agreeableness is being between: (friendly/compassionate vs. challenging/detached).
So this is a clear winner right? Friendly wins. All day. Every day.
Probably wrong. High agreeableness can be seen as naive or submissive.
And some of the great leaders or maybe bosses you’ve had have challenged you instead of agreeing with you.
My belief is life is a balance of these two.
The challenge of raising girls who stand up for themselves, but also work well in teams (a requirement of the real world right?). That’s a challenge that’s always existed, but I think it’s made more tough today.
First, I think schools are actually great places for figuring this out. You don’t realize it but sending your kid to school is probably enough. Providing near constant social interaction is the game, and school is that.
I believe our job as parents is to talk with them when they get home about what they went through. To ask them if that group project was fun, or worrisome. To give encouragement that they can do it, but when they get home, they can hang in their room for 20 minutes to unwind.
If that’s what they need.