I listen to a little bit of Gary Vaynerchuk. Now Gary V is an entrepreneur who’s running a media company right now. He’s blown up over the past few years and I think this is one case where youtube/social media/etc has got it right. Who doesn’t like that Jersey swagger he’s got to him, and he seems to have done it right. Raised in a middle class immigrant family, he’s put it all on the line, worked his butt off and amplified social to make his fame.
But his message is right on. In a world of instant gratification he says, do the hard stuff. In a world of likes and retweets, he talks about his old tweets which got 3 likes. And how doing those things, whether you have 3 followers or 3 million, well that’s the same. If you’re motivated by fame – you’ll always feel unpopular. But if you do it for you – that’s where the happiness lies.
But can his advice translate to parenting?
I think so, I think timeless advice is timeless for a reason.
That timeless advice I focus on here: Do the hard work. He says, “And when you come out the other side, you will be an overnight success.”
My question is how long. How long do you have to do this hard work for your kid to come out the other side as a success?
Well if you believe one of my previous episodes – everyone’s running their own race. So it’s a bit hard to decide if you’re running a 3 year race, 7 year? 15 year?
You know how you take your car in and hope for 300$, then reason it'll probably be $500, and it turns out to be a 1000 and you’re pissed, but somehow you figure it out - that's similar to what we hope for when we wonder how long we have to put in this work of parenting. 1 more year? Until they start middle school? It’s probably more like 7 more years.
Sorry, but your kids success is a long way off. I don’t think you can take your foot off the accelerator until mid teens. But of course I don’t know.
Delayed gratification is tough to teach - harder to implement after living a life without it. I don't know what to tell you - other than - if this what you want - and you believe this is how you get there - then tell yourself ‘This is what it takes to get to the finish line’. Just like a marathon runner - yea those guys want to quit in the middle of the race - but they tell themselves that each step - no matter how painful - gets them to their finish line. What's your finish line? Will you step through the pain?